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You are here: Home / Archives for philosophy

philosophy

Ode to Broccoli – Dr. Seuss style

October 14, 2008 //  by editor

This is my Ode to Broccoli.

I will not eat it in a stew
I will not eat it, not with you

I will not eat it in a pinch
I will not eat it with the grinch

I will not eat it on the run
I will not eat it just for fun

I will not eat it just for lunch
I will not eat just one little bunch

I will not eat this yucky food.
I will not eat it, I might be sued.

I will not eat it on a bus.
If I eat it, I might just cuss

I will not eat it on the lam
I will not eat it, not with ham.

I will not eat it because it’s green
I will not eat it, I might be seen

I will not eat it close to a forge
I will not eat it and neither will George.

George refers to the 41st President of the US, George H. W. Bush, who didn’t like broccoli.

Category: humor, literature, philosophy

More Perverse Wisdom

September 24, 2008 //  by editor

Life isn’t like a box of chocolates.
It’s more like a jar of jalapenos.
What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.

Category: Animated GIF, humor, philosophy, Random Thoughts, Smileys

Perverse Wisdom

September 24, 2008 //  by editor

Just remember — if the world didn’t suck, we would all fall off.

Category: humor, philosophy, Random Thoughts

Russian Proverb

September 15, 2008 //  by editor

A fool is a terrible thing to have around, but a  fool with energy is a nightmare.

Category: philosophyTag: proverb

Proverb

September 11, 2008 //  by editor

May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person who screws up your day and may their arms be too short to scratch.

Category: philosophy, Random Thoughts

Life

September 6, 2008 //  by editor

Life… it’s terminal.

Category: philosophy, Random Thoughts

Confucius Says…

September 2, 2008 //  by editor

Our greatest glory consists not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.
–Confucius

Category: historical, philosophy, quotesTag: proverb

Why Did the Chicken…

August 27, 2008 //  by editor

Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?


BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! The chicken wanted change!

JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

SARAH PALIN: The chicken had to cross the road because he was not able to find a bridge. Alaskans do not build bridges to nowhere. If he wanted a bridge, he’d have to build it himself.
HILLARY CLINTON
: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One! – that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn’t about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don’t really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Where’s my gun?

COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of crossing?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken’s intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won’t realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he’s acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I’m going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

NANCY GRACE, CNN: That chicken crossed the road because he’s guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer’s Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I’ve not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn’t ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn’t that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2008. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra…#@&&^(C%……….reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?
COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

Category: bird watching, humor, philosophy

Stargate SG-1, Stronghold, Quote

August 18, 2008 //  by editor

Teal’c: To resist the influence of others knowledge of oneself is most important.

Category: philosophy, Stargate SG-1 Quote, TV/Movie quotesTag: SciFi, Teal'c

Question

July 28, 2008 //  by editor

If an illegal alien is an undocumented immigrant, why isn’t a drug dealer a unlicensed pharmacist?

Category: philosophy, questions, Random Thoughts

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