Colonel Cameron Mitchell: Intel looks good. We’ve got ourselves a space train full of evil Orville Redenbacher.

Senator Robert Kinsey: Colonel. I swear, O’Neill. There’s gonna be an investigation into this.
Colonel Jack O’Neill: [yelling after Kinsey ] That’d be fine. O’Neill [holding up 3 fingers] two l’s.

Ba’kal: Where are you going?
Teal’c: [calmly] I am leaving. You are about to explode

Colonel Jack O’Neill: To be fair, General, I did it. Carter and Daniel protested. And Teal’c, well he really didn’t say anything but I could tell he was opposed to my actions by the way he cocked his head and sort of raised his eyebrow…

Aris Boch: Well, uh, Teal’c is worth the most. The, uh, System Lords would love to make a good example of him. And Carter here, well, she has the memories of the Tok’ra Jolinar. And you, O’Neill, you’re considered – Well, you’re a pain in the nikta.
Colonel Jack O’Neill: Neck?
Teal’c: No.

Prior: We are beacons on the road to enlightenment.
Lt. Colonel Cameron Mitchell: No, you’re dark-side intergalactic encyclopedia salesmen. Unfortunately, the home office hasn’t been quite upfront with you.
Dr. Daniel Jackson: Nice work on the metaphor.
Mitchell: Thank you.

[The Prior stands and notices Daniel Jackson and Cameron Mitchell standing at the outer edge of the competition circle. Mitchell casually holds the Prior's staff.]
Lt. Colonel Cameron Mitchell: [tossing staff from hand to hand] You looking for this?
[The Prior reaches out. Mitchell fakes the staff being released from his grasp. SG-22 and the Sodan raise their weapons.]
Mitchell: Whoa! [Mitchell pulls the staff back confidently.] No. That’s not going to work.
[The Prior looks very confused.]
Dr. Daniel Jackson: That warm, fuzzy feeling you’re experiencing may be the effects of a device that inhibiting your ability to concentrate and focus your powers.
Mitchell: Symptoms may include dizziness, irritability…
Daniel: Nausea.
Mitchell: Mild nausea, and a condition known as hot dog fingers.
[Mitchell waggles his fingers in demonstration.]
Prior: It makes no difference what you do to me. But know this, the Ori are all seeing.
[Mitchell and Daniel look at the sky in false expectation. Haikon and Jolan look at each other and shake their heads.]
Prior: They are already aware of this affront to their eminence, and shall strike down those who dare to defy them.
Mitchell: Nothing yet. You?
Daniel: Drawing a blank.
[The Prior watches them incredulously.]
Daniel: A little thirsty.
Mitchell: That doesn’t count.
Daniel: No, it doesn’t.

Senator Jarrod Kane: [in disbelief] Don’t you ever give up?
Dr. Daniel Jackson: [sighing] Not until I’m dead. [pauses] And sometimes not even then.

Sgt. Walter Harriman: General O’Neill, Mark Gilmour. He’s your new administrative aid.
Mark Gilmour: General.
Brigadier General Jack O’Neill: Did I order one of these…?
Walter: [speaking over him] No, sir.
Jack: Do I really need…?
Walter: [speaking over him] Yes, sir.

Lt. Colonel Samantha Carter: So, any big plans for the weekend?
General Jack O’Neill: [putting the groceries on the counter] Oh yeah, big. Huge!
Sam: Yeah, me neither.
Jack: Oh, what are you talkin’ about? I just walked in with a whole handful of ingredients for my world-famous omelet!
Sam: World-famous, huh? What’s in it?
[removing bottles of beer from the grocery bags]
Jack: Eggs.
Sam: I don’t think that that actually qualifies as a recipe.
Jack: Oh, don’t kid yourself. There’s a secret ingredient. I can’t tell you what it is or I’d have to shoot you.
Sam: It’s beer isn’t it?