Slow Twitch – Elizabeth Hansen

From Richard Hammond’s lastest article on … hands-on engineering

“My mate Hadrian, an engineer, came over with all the required kit for the operation, including the new lump of chassis. His stated intention was to pull up a chair and work his way through a giant sack of popcorn while I provided the entertainment by burning the workshop to the ground and blinding myself as I learned how to weld. Good plan.”

Read the whole thing at: http://www.topgear.com/uk/richard-hammond/richard-hammond-top-gear-magazine-column-2012-03-27

About 2 months ago, my girlfriend started reading Richard Hammond’s On the Edge.  She kept reading bits to me until I could take it no more – about 10 minutes – and went off an bought my own copy. Needless to say it took me awhile to crack the spine (figuratively… I like to keep my books as pristine as possible) even though she kept quoting bits to me. And then I read a bit, and then a little bit more not getting very far. So a couple of days ago I bought the audio version, only after checking to make sure the voice on the other end of the earphones was Richard.  Unfortunately it is an abridged version.  I have 2 problems with abridged version.  1) Bits are missing. and 2) if the author had wanted those bits missing he (or she) wouldn’t have written them in the first place.  How do they know what I will think is important? So basically I get annoyed.  And having read the 1st couple of chapters, I could see out what was missing right off the bat. Oh well.

“It’s been said that the quest for truth is the noblest occupation of man, but there be dragons lurking in the dark forests of ignorance. And the names of these dragons are ‘Incompetence’ and ‘Political Bias’ and ‘Deliberate Distortion’ and ‘Sheer, Wrongheaded Stupidity.’ Our gallant friends here in Contemporary History bravely sallied forth to do battle with these dragons in their recently published ‘Cyrga Affair.’ It is with the deepest regret that I must inform you that the dragons won.”
Professor Itagne, Foreign Affairs Department, University of Matherion

The Hidden City, Tamuli Part 3
David Eddings

Yo, Dude! The Origins of Common Slang Words

By: Danielle Samaniego

Slang is defined as an informal nonstandard vocabulary composed typically of coinages, arbitrarily changed words, and extravagant, forced, or facetious figures of speech, according to Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary.

In other words, slang can be “a dope spin on a sick word that deserves props for being mad fly, yo.”

And yet, in the age of And yet, in the age of

It is known that there is an infinite number of worlds, simply because there is an infinite amount of space for them to be in. However, not every one of them is inhabited. Therefore, there must be a finite number of inhabited worlds. Any finite number divided by infinity is as near to nothing as makes no odds, so the average population of all the planets in the universe can be said to be zero. From this it follows that the population of the universe is also zero, and that any people you may meet from time to time are merely the product of a deranged imagination.
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Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

There is an art, or, rather, a knack to flying. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
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The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy in Life, the Universe, and Everything

To summarize: it is a well-known fact that those people who must want to rule people are, ipso facto, those least suited to do it. To summarize the summary: anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. To summarize the summary of the summary: people are a problem.
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The Restaurant at the End of the Universe

Chapter 29
This is an important announcement. This is flight 121 to Los Angeles. If your travel plans today do not include Los Angeles, now would be a perfect time to disembark.
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So Long and Thanks For All The Fish